Posts tagged trust

Shaking and in tears, the woman I have secretly been in love with for most of my life had just stood outside my car window and told me that she wished the baby was mine.  But it never would be.  I couldn’t speak.  I think I even stopped breathing for a few minutes.  All I could so was stare blankly off at the traffic in the distance and try to remember how to make my mouth work.  There is no doubt that I wished the exact same thing.  I mean I was wishing for a lot of things at that moment but it was just too late.  Mark had been the only person that knew about my feelings for Jenna.  He was the only person I trusted.  I had always been afraid to say anything to her about it.  Once I found out that they were sleeping together I swore I would never so much as look as either of them ever again.  I honestly didn’t think I could keep myself from killing them both if I did.  And now, this woman that I had struggled so hard, and failed, to reveal my love for was mouthing words that confirmed she felt the same way about me.  I couldn’t hear anything she was saying over the loud gushing sounds of my brain pulsating in my skull.  I don’t remember slamming my foot on the gas but all of the sudden I was streaking through the parking lot.  I didn’t know where I was going or what I was going to do.  All I knew is that I hoped Mark would be better at raising a kid than he was at being a friend.